Girls Will Be Boys, Boys Will Be Girls

by tedgar | More from this Blogger

My daughter has a doll. Her name is Georgina. This is a rather odd name here, and people often comment on it. You see, originally Georgina was going to be named George. However, after a number of comments on the fact that George was wearing a pink dress, my daughter changed her doll's name to Georgina. My daughter thought very little of it, but I was a tad perturbed. I balk at the need for preschool children to fit into specific gender guidelines for behavior, and I don't see the need for their dollies to do so either.

I know a number of children who wear dresses, sparkly shoes, and fancy nail polish. Some of them happen to be boys. Aside from my "I only wear pink" phase at age six, I was never the girl to wear such things. They got in the way of playing in the mud and running around the forest. I'd love to say that I've now converted to fancy dress, but the fact is that I still like playing in the mud - I just do it professionally as an outdoor educator. For a while, I vowed that my daughter would not wear pink either. Then I realized: pink is just a color. It's not something to avoid or seek out, it's just there.

I know a number of children who love trucks. One of them happens to be my daughter. Her favorite toys right now are dolls, Lego, Playmobil figures, and her assortment of trucks and cars, including a super cool VW Van that we purchased at a garage sale last year. A recent visitor to our home was somewhat surprised by our extensive collection of trucks, planes, and a garage. I have a daughter, yes, but she likes to play with trucks. She also plays with dresses and dolls. I've never gendered trucks - women drive them, and girls can play with them.

But what of the boys? I see so many preschool-aged boys out there who love sparkly nail polish. Although I'm not a fan of it myself, I see the attraction. What of these boys? Will they be accepted the way my daughter is, with a comment about their great nail polish, just in passing? I hope so. I can see that although we're ready to let girls play with trucks, sometimes we're not ready to let preschool-aged boys wear nail polish.

As preschoolers, all of our children explore what it means to be a boy or a girl. They try on roles and see what fits. In my circles, I see a gradual acceptance of the blurring between "girl stuff" and "boy stuff," and I'm happy about this. I've never distinguished between these things for my preschool-aged daughter, and I hope that as she grows older she accepts girls who like trucks and boys who wear nail polish as a part of her world that doesn't require a further glance.

Learn more about tedgar

Tricia Edgar is a mom of one lovely daughter. Before her daughter was born, she decided to be guided by the needs of her child, and this led her to attachment parenting philosophies.

View Full Profile | More from this Blogger